I am still maintaining the best mental balance I have had in the last twenty years. Things seem to becoming easier to manage and I am focusing on managing my thoughts in a positive way. Work has been going extremely well. I have not had the same anxiety I have had in the past. I look forward to going in to work every day and am in no hurry to leave. We are working well as a team amidst a challenging situation and maintaining the level of professionalism that our customers expect. I am trying to ask more questions to make sure we are all on the same page and communication at this time is really helping us with our success.
I have this weekend off which is a much needed break for me. I have been pushing myself physically to the limit and need to take some time to relax. My boss has told me not to push myself too hard and I need to start taking that advice. I have just always had a very strong work ethic and only know one way to work. I have to slow things down a bit, especially with the increased temperatures.
Jodi is done school now and I am sure she is looking forward to some down time. I got her some flowers last night to celebrate finishing another school year. I wish I got an opportunity to see her teach but, I know she is very good at what she does. She cares a lot about her students and works hard to make sure they are getting a good education. It will be good to spend some time together this weekend. I believe we are even going to get some steaks tonight to have a barbecue. We will probably drop by my parents this afternoon to go for a swim. Southern Ontario is going through a bit of a heat wave the last few days and it will be nice to take a dip. My brother Matt is coming up for the day I think and I am looking forward to catching up with him. He has bi polar as well and we have always shared a strong bond. We have both come leaps and bounds from years past and it is wonderful to share in the success that we both seem to be having at this point.
I have not had a chance to watch too many of the world cup matches but, the ones I have watched have been quite entertaining. I still cannot believe that Portugal scored with thirty seconds left against the States. I thought that match was over and then Ronaldo had that perfect cross. I am glad the US still managed to make it through to the next round. I am really looking forward to watching the Netherlands against Mexico. My boss and his wife are Dutch so I like to keep apprised of how the team is doing. Mexico has been playing very good football so it should be a great match.
We have been doing a tonne of mulching these days. My advice to you if you are putting down mulch on your property is to make sure you do it right. Mulch should be applied at least 2-3 inches thick or it will not cut down on weeding the way it is intended to do. It also looks sharper when there is a thick layer. It is better to have too much on than not enough. If you have edges on your beds, make sure you flip the edges up after you put the mulch down. It looks like shit if mulch is heaping over the edge.
Pruning season is upon us and I cannot wait. I had the opportunity to prune all day yesterday and I was in my zone. It is amazing what you can accomplish in one day if you really put your mind to it. I seem to have a gift for pruning and I love the feeling I get from it. I know how to prune most varieties of plants and shrubs and am still learning as I go. I am starting to get more of the names but, still have a long way to go with plant identification. I ask my boss as much as I can as he is quite astute at not only identifying plants and shrubs but, also how they should be pruned. I love to continue to learn new things every year and have absorbed a lot of information over the last few years. I still make some mistakes along the way but, that is part of the growing process.
I hope this finds you in good spirits. Have a great weekend. Bye for now. Take care, Shawn.
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of
arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid
in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out,
and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”
―
Hunter S. Thompson
Saturday, 28 June 2014
Sunday, 15 June 2014
Happy Fathers Day
This past week was a challenging one for me but, I made it through. It started on Monday when I could not find my wallet. I was late for work and my mind was out of sorts worrying about having to replacing everything. We did a planting job that went fairly well except that I found out at the end of the day that I may have not dug the holes wide enough. I did not sleep one night and I was having some messed up thoughts race through my mind which was challenging. As the week progressed, things slowly improved in my my mind. Each day was better than the last and Friday turned out to be my best day.
The thing that I am happy with about last week was that I continued to push through and battle. It is difficult to navigate daily life at times when my mind is filled with bull shit. A day like last Monday would have thrown me off for a whole week in the past but, I made a strong effort to reset my mind frame and aim for success. Jodi ended up finding my wallet the next day which was a big help in changing the course of the week.
We got a lot accomplished at work yesterday. My boss took the time to show me around the planting job from Monday and patiently explained the proper way things should be done. Devon and I went back and made things right as Mike Holmes would say and it looks a lot more professional now. I was able to do some pruning yesterday which I love and we finished an edging job at one of my favorite customers. It looks really sharp now as Christine and Heather went through the beds there too and did an amazing job weeding. Jesse and Heather did really well with mulching at another property and that place is looking sharp as well.
Jesse really stepped up this week. He ended up having to cut grass by himself on Tuesday afternoon and did amazing to keep us on track for the week. He works really hard and is a big asset to us. I love his positive attitude and he has become a good friend to me.
My nephew Elias was in a performance yesterday in Oakville. I was really happy we had the chance to be there to see it. He did wonderfully and it was probably the best children's performance I have seen. It was a pirate themed play and all the kids did a great job. I actually cried during the first part of the performance. It was not the actual performance but, rather watching my nephew up there in front of all those people. I thought of all he has been through in his young life and it made me emotional. I am so proud of him and am glad to be his Uncle.
Today is fathers day. I had a chance to see my dad this afternoon for a little bit. My dad is not always a man of many words but, he has certainly helped me get to where I am today. He has been there in my darkest times and always had words of encouragement for me. I am proud to call him my dad. Fathers day is a day to celebrate all the men in our lives. Just because someone may not have children does not mean they do not impact others in a positive way. My boss has played a big role in my life and am thankful for his impact on me. I also see my Uncle Jerry as a fatherly figure in my life and have held him in high regard for a long time now. I know I do not have children but, I hope I have had an impact on those I have come across in some way. So to all the male influences in our lives, Happy Fathers Day!!!!
Have a great week. I will try to write a little bit more this week. Take care, Shawn.
Life isn’t a matter of milestones, but of moments.
Rose Kennedy
The thing that I am happy with about last week was that I continued to push through and battle. It is difficult to navigate daily life at times when my mind is filled with bull shit. A day like last Monday would have thrown me off for a whole week in the past but, I made a strong effort to reset my mind frame and aim for success. Jodi ended up finding my wallet the next day which was a big help in changing the course of the week.
We got a lot accomplished at work yesterday. My boss took the time to show me around the planting job from Monday and patiently explained the proper way things should be done. Devon and I went back and made things right as Mike Holmes would say and it looks a lot more professional now. I was able to do some pruning yesterday which I love and we finished an edging job at one of my favorite customers. It looks really sharp now as Christine and Heather went through the beds there too and did an amazing job weeding. Jesse and Heather did really well with mulching at another property and that place is looking sharp as well.
Jesse really stepped up this week. He ended up having to cut grass by himself on Tuesday afternoon and did amazing to keep us on track for the week. He works really hard and is a big asset to us. I love his positive attitude and he has become a good friend to me.
My nephew Elias was in a performance yesterday in Oakville. I was really happy we had the chance to be there to see it. He did wonderfully and it was probably the best children's performance I have seen. It was a pirate themed play and all the kids did a great job. I actually cried during the first part of the performance. It was not the actual performance but, rather watching my nephew up there in front of all those people. I thought of all he has been through in his young life and it made me emotional. I am so proud of him and am glad to be his Uncle.
Today is fathers day. I had a chance to see my dad this afternoon for a little bit. My dad is not always a man of many words but, he has certainly helped me get to where I am today. He has been there in my darkest times and always had words of encouragement for me. I am proud to call him my dad. Fathers day is a day to celebrate all the men in our lives. Just because someone may not have children does not mean they do not impact others in a positive way. My boss has played a big role in my life and am thankful for his impact on me. I also see my Uncle Jerry as a fatherly figure in my life and have held him in high regard for a long time now. I know I do not have children but, I hope I have had an impact on those I have come across in some way. So to all the male influences in our lives, Happy Fathers Day!!!!
Have a great week. I will try to write a little bit more this week. Take care, Shawn.
Life isn’t a matter of milestones, but of moments.
Rose Kennedy
Sunday, 1 June 2014
Best Start Ever
I have not made a blog entry in quite some time so I thought it would be a good time to check back in. I am happy to say that things in my world have been going quite well. I have a found a healthy balance in my life and am enjoying the absence of long periods of mental anguish. I have been able to keep my thoughts in check for the most part and have started to realize what a psychiatrist once told me. He told me to think of my thoughts as being translucent, having them pass right through my mind and not allowing them to linger.
Work has been going amazingly well this year. This is the best start to any job I have ever had. Things seem to be falling in to place quite nicely and I am really enjoying the work I am doing. I never thought we would make it through April with all the storm clean up we did but, here we are at the beginning of June. I am constantly learning and trying to maintain the professionalism that our customers expect. My boss has been great with us and I appreciate his input in helping me grow. This is the best relationship both professionally and personally that my boss and I have ever shared. We have been through a lot together and I think we have come to understand each other in really positive way.
We had quite a scare about a month a go now. My boss had a transient ischemic attack (TIA) which is a mini- stroke. It was a shock because he has done physical work his whole life and is in good shape. He lost his license and is not supposed to start work again until September. He is feeling much better now but, still has to go through the waiting process. We are doing our best to make things work for the company and feel we are working really well as a team to make the best of things. Jesse and Heather are doing a wonderful job and we have added an amazing woman named Christine to the mix. She has done amazing and has been a big asset to us. A young man named Devon started a few weeks a go too and is getting better each day. I think it will just take him some time to get used to the long days and coping with the heat. Our customers have been patient as most of them are aware of what my boss has been going through. All and all, we are holding things together and working hard to achieve success.
We finished a sod job on Friday which I am really pleased with. I believe I was able to maintain the grade so that the water still drained in the appropriate manner. The customers are a lovely couple and are very happy with the work we did. They had been waiting a long time for a new lawn and I am certain they will enjoy their back yard a lot more now.
Jodi is almost done another school year. She is starting to work on report cards which are due in a few weeks. I am glad she will get a chance to relax for a bit and spend some time with Ollie over the summer. I think she may end up going out east at some point to visit her parents. I would love to go too but, do not want to take much time off this year. I may book a day or two off here or there to go camping but, do not plan to be a way for an extended period of time. I am hoping Jodi and I will get a chance to play some golf this year as it has been a few years since we hit the links. Our relationship continues to grow and we are in a good place right now.
I feel fortunate to be where I am at right now. My life could have easily gone another direction if I had not made changes. I was reflecting yesterday and cried. I thought of all the times my mind was in a dark place and when suicidal thoughts were severe in nature. Somehow I have made it to today and I do not take that fore-granted. Life is a gift that I did not always want. I am able to experience joy now and appreciate the little things on a daily basis. My mind is not absent of struggle but, the road I am traveling has become a little smoother.
Hope this finds you well. Take care, Shawn.
“The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong.”
― Laura Ingalls Wilder
Work has been going amazingly well this year. This is the best start to any job I have ever had. Things seem to be falling in to place quite nicely and I am really enjoying the work I am doing. I never thought we would make it through April with all the storm clean up we did but, here we are at the beginning of June. I am constantly learning and trying to maintain the professionalism that our customers expect. My boss has been great with us and I appreciate his input in helping me grow. This is the best relationship both professionally and personally that my boss and I have ever shared. We have been through a lot together and I think we have come to understand each other in really positive way.
We had quite a scare about a month a go now. My boss had a transient ischemic attack (TIA) which is a mini- stroke. It was a shock because he has done physical work his whole life and is in good shape. He lost his license and is not supposed to start work again until September. He is feeling much better now but, still has to go through the waiting process. We are doing our best to make things work for the company and feel we are working really well as a team to make the best of things. Jesse and Heather are doing a wonderful job and we have added an amazing woman named Christine to the mix. She has done amazing and has been a big asset to us. A young man named Devon started a few weeks a go too and is getting better each day. I think it will just take him some time to get used to the long days and coping with the heat. Our customers have been patient as most of them are aware of what my boss has been going through. All and all, we are holding things together and working hard to achieve success.
We finished a sod job on Friday which I am really pleased with. I believe I was able to maintain the grade so that the water still drained in the appropriate manner. The customers are a lovely couple and are very happy with the work we did. They had been waiting a long time for a new lawn and I am certain they will enjoy their back yard a lot more now.
Jodi is almost done another school year. She is starting to work on report cards which are due in a few weeks. I am glad she will get a chance to relax for a bit and spend some time with Ollie over the summer. I think she may end up going out east at some point to visit her parents. I would love to go too but, do not want to take much time off this year. I may book a day or two off here or there to go camping but, do not plan to be a way for an extended period of time. I am hoping Jodi and I will get a chance to play some golf this year as it has been a few years since we hit the links. Our relationship continues to grow and we are in a good place right now.
I feel fortunate to be where I am at right now. My life could have easily gone another direction if I had not made changes. I was reflecting yesterday and cried. I thought of all the times my mind was in a dark place and when suicidal thoughts were severe in nature. Somehow I have made it to today and I do not take that fore-granted. Life is a gift that I did not always want. I am able to experience joy now and appreciate the little things on a daily basis. My mind is not absent of struggle but, the road I am traveling has become a little smoother.
Hope this finds you well. Take care, Shawn.
“The real things haven't changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong.”
― Laura Ingalls Wilder
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