Beautiful Day

I had an excellent day today.  Driving in to work,  I was a little uncertain as to whether I was mentally prepared for the day.  Turns out I was and I really enjoyed being outside on this beautiful day.  I had a chance to work with my boss a bit which was nice.  He pointed some things out to us that we need to keep an eye on.  It must be difficult not being able to do a lot of the things he used to do.  I know I would find that challenging.  It is really unfortunate that the ER physician took his license a way with such haste.  As I learned,  dealing with the MTO can be a long process.  He has been cleared to go back to work in a week which is good news.

My boss pointed out to me that I had some f bombs in one of my last posts.  I thought about it and went back to clean up the post a little bit.  The profanity I used in that post was unnecessary and I did not need to use it to make my point.  Tailgating just bothers me to no end and I did not think before I wrote.  There will be times where I may use a profane word but, I will try not to unless I am describing strategies I use for a balanced mind. 

I have got some positive response to my magazine letter.  Our friend Allison asked if she could share it with some of her colleagues.  Of course I said yes.  Part of the reason I wrote the letter was to spread awareness.  My first and last name is on the letter so it is out there now.  I am not ashamed of having bi polar and love discussing the illness with anyone who may be curious.  I dealt with things on my own for so long with little or no success.  It was not until I started letting people in that I started to make progress towards stability.  That was probably one of the biggest things for me to accept.  Realizing I needed help and that I needed to make some lifestyle changes in order to progress and not continually regress.  I still take steps backwards at times but, they are not giant sized ones that inhibit me in living a positive way.

Jodi has made some burgers for dinner so I better get going.  She makes an awesome burger and I am pretty hungry.  Hope you had a good day.  Take care,  Shawn.

“When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.”
― Paulo Coelho, Brida

Letter to Editor

I had a good day today.  I was feeling a little down this morning but, decided to cut some grass to get myself moving.  I cut my parents, our place and our neighbor's.  I find it helpful to force myself to do things when my mind is a bit off.  I got a chance to go for a swim today and chat with my dad a little bit.

We had Saturday off this week.  It honestly feel like I have been off work for three or four days.  We have just been so busy,  I have become accustomed to working Saturdays and have actually quite enjoyed them.  I am looking forward to another positive week at work.  My letter to the editor got published in this months Landscape Ontario magazine and I am quite proud of it.  I wrote about mental health and the positive impact the landscaping industry has had on me.  I am really anxious for my boss and his wife to read it as I value their opinion a lot.  If you want to take a look, go to http://www.horttrades.com/horticulture-review-online. It is in the July 15th issue and the title is Landscaping Industry Gave Me Purpose.  I hope it will get some new conversations going on regarding mental health and the positive impact natural landscapes can have on people.

I am still enjoying the best year I have had in a long time.  I still need to continue to grow and make some changes to allow me to succeed.  I have to learn how to manage money better and let Jodi help me in that regard.  I have done much better this year but, I need to start cutting back on some things in order to help us get to our ultimate goal which is buying the house we rent.  We love it here and I know somehow we will find a way to stay here.

I also need to make sure I maintain a regular sleep regime.  Sleep is of the utmost importance as it is part of a daily routine.  The same way I take medication basically at the same time everyday,  I need to make sure I continue to go to bed around the same time each night.  I function much better when I get a good nights sleep.

Speaking of sleep,  I need to head to bed.  I hope you have a great week ahead of you.  Bye for now.  Shawn.

 “None but ourselves can free our minds.”
― Bob Marley

Sad

Tonight I am sad.  We had the going a way party Heather tonight which inevitably meant I had to say my goodbye.  I made it through the party without getting emotional but, broke down as soon as I started walking to my car.  I cried almost the whole way home.  The drive was somewhat of a blur.  I am really going to miss her and it simply hit me what a big part of my life she has been.  I am so happy for her though and know the next chapter will be a good one.

On the news today,  there was a story about an Acton man who was tailgating someone.  As he passed the other vehicle, he threw a metal object at them and it smashed the driver side window.  Fortunately they caught him and he is facing four charges. Tailgating really ticks me off.  There is no purpose to it and it puts peoples lives at risk.  If people are in that much of a hurry, leave earlier or just relax and enjoy the drive.  Is riding someone's bumper worth a life? Think about that the next time you think of driving up on a vehicle in front of you.

We had a great day of grass cutting today.  We had some catching up to do and put a big dent in our weekly list.  Should be a good day tomorrow and looks as though we will have Saturday off which I am really looking forward to.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your week.  Take care,  Shawn.

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”
― Gautama Buddha

Heather

I had a great weekend.  Worked for a half day Saturday and then really made an effort just to relax.  My weekends this year have been quite enjoyable, especially my Sundays.  In the past, I had spent an unnecessary amount of time filled with anxiety on Sundays, worrying about what Monday would bring.  This year I have had not had that same issue and I can attribute that to having a better balance mentally.  I have learned that it serves no purpose to waste time thinking about what may or may not happen in the week ahead.

I am so proud of Clara Hughes and her team for completing their bike ride across Canada to spread awareness surrounding mental health.  She has really taken the lead in helping break some stigmas relating to mental health.  She is an inspiring individual and I would love to hear her speak at some point.  We still have a long way to go but, the Bell Let's Talk initiative is a step in the right direction.

I hope to finish some books in the next few weeks that I have been putting off.  It is no that I do not enjoy reading,  I have just been so physically tired the last while.  If you have a chance, check out Wendy K Williamson's blog at http://wendykwilliamson.wordpress.com/. She has written I'm Not Crazy, Just Bipolar and Two Bipolar Chicks Guide to Survival.  I have been fortunate enough to converse a little bit with her via e-mail and have enjoyed her books immensely.

We had a half day today.  We worked this morning and were done at 1:00.  It was quite the storm coming through and there was no sign of it dissipating anytime soon.  Heather and Christine called it a day around the same time I believe.  I am really enjoying my afternoon as the decision to call it a day was an easy one and there was no stress or anxiety related to it.  It was expected that we would not get a full day in and so I am able to spend some quality time with Jodi and Ollie without being filled with worry.

Tomorrow night, we are having a going a way party for Heather.  She is leaving on Friday for Sault St Marie as her and Brian are moving back there.  Our little company is like a family.  We have had our ups and downs but, we do seem to really care about one another.  Losing Heather will be a hard transition to make.  Not only is she very good at what she does but, she is an amazing person and I will certainly miss her a lot.  Her and I have helped get each other through the last few years.  She has always been there for me when I needed a hug and we have been able to pick each other up when we were down.  I would not have made it through some things without her help and I am very grateful for her support over the last four years.  I wish them all the best in the next chapter of their lives.  I hope Heather will take some much deserved time to relax and that the next year will be stress free.  Thanks for being a good friend Heather.

Hope you are having a good day.  Take care,  Shawn.


“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life

Happy 1rst Micah

My niece Micah had her first birthday yesterday.  We had a chance to celebrate last Tuesday and to have a barbecue at my parents.  I am so happy to have her in our lives.  She has grown so much over the last year and seems to be getting closer to her first steps.  Her smile is infectious and I always embrace having a chance to spend time with her.

Tuesday was Canada Day.  I love this country and Canada Day is probably my favorite holiday.  We had Micah's party and then Jodi and I went home to relax for a while.  At night, we started our yearly tradition of walking up to the fireworks.  My dad came with us and we managed to get our usual spot to get a prime vantage point for the show.  They were a little shorter this year but, were probably the best ones I have seen here.  Ollie does not do so well with loud noises so we had to leave him at home.

It was a little odd having a holiday on a Tuesday.  Just messes up your routine a little bit.  My head was thrown off for a while on Wednesday morning but, was able to get back in rhythm later in the day.

Work has been crazy busy the last while.  Looks like we have finally caught up to things a little bit and we may not have to work Saturdays for a while.  I have not minded working most Saturdays this year but, I will definitely enjoy a little slower pace.  Pruning season is here so time will fly by the next month or so.  Once I get through August,  I find the last three months easier to manage as I have some down time to look forward to.

My letter to the editor is getting published in this months Landscape Ontario magazine.  I cannot wait to see it in print.  I wrote about mental health and the positive influence the landscaping industry has had on me.  Hopefully people will like it and any chance I have to spread even a little awareness around mental health is a positive thing.

I often wondered if I had any real purpose in life.  I realize now that maybe I am meant to share some of my story in order to help others.  There would be no point in going through what I have and impacting others in a negative way at times, if there was no lessons to be learned.  I feel I have a lot to share and am now in a good place to be able to do that effectively.

Stress Tip of the Day
Stress is not good for anyone.  I have always struggled immensely with managing stress but, have become better suited to deal with it.  I try to avoid stressful situations and focus on little things in order to make that happen.  One thing I find helps me pertains to shopping.  I do not like shopping.  I do not like parking lots.  This tip drives Jodi nuts but,  it helps me out a lot.  When most people park to shop,  they look for the closest parking spot to the mall/store.  I do the complete opposite.  I look for the furthest possible spot.  The spot with virtually no one around.  Sure it means walking a little bit but,  it makes for a nice exit and I do not have to worry about people or other cars close by.  

Landscaping Tip of the Day
I love grass cutting and have become quite proficient at it.  This tip relates to grass trimming.  A common mistake I see made with trimming is the length at which people trim the grass along their edges.  Scalping the grass is a common occurrence and is something that should be avoided if possible.  Remember that the grass that is being trimmed should be the same length of the mower and not lower.  The trimmer head should not be directly on the grass but, hovering just above instead.  Different makes and models of trimmers require different techniques but, just remember that trimming too low, does not make for good show.  Happy Trimming.

Hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend.  Good mental health.  Take care,  Shawn.

“I know it seems hard sometimes but remember one thing. Through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it get, stick your chest out, keep ya head up.... and handle it.”
― Tupac Shakur