7 Years

I recently celebrated 7 years of sobriety.  My last drink was on November 2nd, 2009.  There is no question I would have lost everything if I had not made the choice to abstain from alcohol.  As I have mentioned in the past, I wish I would have never picked up that first drink.  If I had known back then what an intensely addictive personality I had, I would have never touched it.  But how was I to know at such a young age.

I find it interesting when some people say that if they look at their life as a whole, they would not change a thing.  If I could go back, I would change a shit load of things.  Especially when it comes to alcohol consumption.  For the most part, I was often embarrassed and ashamed of who I was when I drank.  I affected others in a negative way with my actions and behavior at times and I will carry those choices with me for the rest of my life.  Yes, I live with bi polar and addictions but, I am still responsible for my own decisions.  I hope that over the last seven years, I have demonstrated that I have the ability to change and that hopefully I will be able to have a positive impact on mental health awareness.

 I know their is a reason I am still alive today but, I often struggle to see it.  I continue to have some very dark days at times but, I have not given up. I will write a blog in the new year that will hopefully shed more light on what I deal with internally on certain days.  I am hoping to find an opportunity to speak to a group.  I think my story may be able to help others in some small way, especially with youth.

I trust you are well.  Have an amazing weekend and Happy Thanksgiving to those down south.

Take care,  Shawn.

Believe in your own ability to overcome challenges along this journey we call life.  S.A

Horrible Mistake

I did watch the coverage of the U.S election night.  As the evening progressed, a sinking feeling came over me.  I could no longer watch and went to bed.  I awoke the next morning hoping I had just had a bad dream.  I did not even know the final results but, there was an uneasiness in the air and I did not even have to check to know what had happened.  It had not been a bad dream, it was a reality.  It was a big joke, that was certainly funny no longer.

The United States had voted in a man who is racist, a sexist, a misogynist, egocentric and who does not have an iota of political experience.  Donald Trump somehow convinced the majority of Americans that someone of his ilk was qualified to run the most powerful nation in the world.  I find it to be a very scary proposition.  The most troubling aspect of his appointment is that so many Americans bought in to his bullshit.  There was no substance to anything he preached.  His victory is disturbing as it exposed the deep rooted racism that still exists in America.  His election rallies could be compared to those of a KKK rally or even a Nazi rally.  I thought the U.S had progressed a little bit in terms of equality for all but, his appointment proves otherwise.  I believe they regressed a hundred years by voting in someone like Donald Trump and it saddens me that so many Americans actually share his view points. 

I will no longer waste any more time in the future writing about this subject.  It is what it is.  The United States made their choice and for them and unfortunately the world, I believe they will find that they made a horrible mistake.

Shawn