The last few weeks for our family have been very trying. The service for Amaya was on Tuesday and it was beautiful in every aspect. The pastor had some important words for us and it helped give me a sense of peace. Bart spoke with great courage at the service and had a touching message. There was a video montage that affected me deeply. I was trying to be strong for the visitation but, all my emotions flowed out at the service. The amount of love, strength and support that was present at the church was amazing. I will never forget Amaya and know she will always be present in my heart.
Life works in mysterious ways at times. As we were saying goodbye to Amaya, a bundle of joy was brought in to this world. I am happy to announce that Rylen Huck Amayan was born on May 21rst, 2012. Rylen is the son of my brother Ryan and his wonderful wife, Deb. He was born at almost nine pounds and apparently is a strong little fellow. His hair is a mix of Ryan's natural blonde and Deb's beautiful red hair. I cannot wait to meet him in August and hold him close. His gift of life is something that I am eternally grateful for. I hope I can be an Uncle that he can be proud of and I know Jodi will be a loving Aunt.
The last two weeks has been such a mixture of emotions. Sadness, anger, fear, joy are just a few that I have felt. I know Amaya has been looking down on me during this time as I could easily have slipped in to old patterns. This was the first time in a long time that I had a strong urge to take a drink but, I did not. I knew that was not what Amaya would have wanted and I still want to be a good role model for Elias and Rylen.
The health of my mind is remarkably strong right now. It is hard to believe where I have come from to get to this point. I still struggle but, never would have been able to cope like I have recently if this was three or four years a go. I consider myself quite fortunate and am grateful for the life I have been given.
Peace be with you.
Take care, Shawn
Saturday, 26 May 2012
Saturday, 19 May 2012
Amaya Charlotte Grace
I am writing this morning with a heavy heart. My niece Amaya was born on May 13th and sadly passed away on May 15th. She was a beautiful little girl, an angel. I am having a hard time processing it and my heart aches for Leslie, Bart and Elias. I cannot imagine the pain they have been experiencing during these last few days.
We were planning on going down to meet Amaya this weekend. I was looking forward to holding her in my arms and laying her tiny hands in mine. I take solace in the fact that her brief time on this earth was spent with such amazingly good people and a wonderful family. The unconditional love that she would have felt in her brief time with us will stay with her spirit for eternity. I know she is in a better place now but, I miss her dearly.
Sunday, 13 May 2012
Some Catching Up
Seems like it has been almost a month since I last wrote in my blog, time has been flying by of late.
The last time I wrote a blog, I had just watched a documentary called The Cove. It was about dolphin slaughters in Japan, something close to 25 000 a year. The film crew covertly made their way at night in to the cove where the slaughter was taking place and hid cameras and sound equipment. They got them on camera slaughtering these innocent dolphins in a most inhumane manner. Blood soaked the ocean water as dolphins desperately tried to avoid their ultimate fate. I guess that live dolphins are worth a lot more for shows at places like Sea World across the globe, fetching up to 150 000 dollars per. I am quite shocked and disappointed that these practices still continue today. Although whaling has been banned worldwide, the Japanese continue the practice under a scientific loop hole in the International Whaling Commissions guidelines. The Japanese also fund smaller nations in the Commission to guarantee their support in controversial matters. The most disappointing aspect of watching this documentary was that after all the risk the film makers went through to bring this matter to the world's attention, the dolphin hunt was still scheduled to proceed as usual the following year. It makes you feel helpless as an individual. If such a powerful film cannot make a difference, what can one person do. I know one thing, I will not be visiting Marineland any time soon as places such as those are part of the problem on a larger scale.
Work has surprisingly been going quite well so far. A few mental lapses here ad there but, fairly balanced for the most part. I am still trying to break the day in to small sections which has made it simpler to have positive days. Grass cutting has started which has been going smoothly so far. The grass is quite thick right now with the combination of some moisture, fertilizer and some good sun. I love cutting grass and hopefully that is what I will be doing for the majority of the time. I was helping out with an inter lock job last Friday. I was mainly hauling dirt and clay from the back yard and loading it in to the trailer which was pretty straightforward. My back and neck have been giving me some issues of late so I have to be careful how far I push myself.
Jodi has had a sinus infection for the last week or so and seems to be near the end of it. I have managed not to get it which is good as we are pretty booked up at work right now. We went to my parents to deliver breakfast for mothers day today. I was in charge of the eggs which I must say were pretty damn good. We mulched our garden yesterday and it really stands out now. It is amazing what you can accomplish in an afternoon when you put your mind to it.
Canada lost last night to the US in the Norceca Olympic qualifying tournament which was shitty news to wake up to. I really thought this would be the year they ended their Olympic drought. They have to be proud of their accomplishments over the last few years though. They did qualify for World League which is a huge step for the program in general. It actually starts this weekend in Toronto, hopefully we can get to one of the matches.
Jays have been hanging in there of late. They just need to eliminate some late game lapses and beat up on teams they should beat up on. I take back what I said about Thames going down to Vegas, I have been impressed with his play of late. I am pumped that we picked up Vlad Guerrero, to have an another experienced bat in the line up. I am really hoping they move Edwin to first, Vlad to DH and Lind out of the line up. Lind seems like a nice guy but, he is just not producing like a first base man should.
Hope this finds you well.
Happy Mothers Day!!!
Remember that although a wall may seem to high to climb in life, if you take it down one brick at a time you will be eventually be able to walk through it with ease.
The last time I wrote a blog, I had just watched a documentary called The Cove. It was about dolphin slaughters in Japan, something close to 25 000 a year. The film crew covertly made their way at night in to the cove where the slaughter was taking place and hid cameras and sound equipment. They got them on camera slaughtering these innocent dolphins in a most inhumane manner. Blood soaked the ocean water as dolphins desperately tried to avoid their ultimate fate. I guess that live dolphins are worth a lot more for shows at places like Sea World across the globe, fetching up to 150 000 dollars per. I am quite shocked and disappointed that these practices still continue today. Although whaling has been banned worldwide, the Japanese continue the practice under a scientific loop hole in the International Whaling Commissions guidelines. The Japanese also fund smaller nations in the Commission to guarantee their support in controversial matters. The most disappointing aspect of watching this documentary was that after all the risk the film makers went through to bring this matter to the world's attention, the dolphin hunt was still scheduled to proceed as usual the following year. It makes you feel helpless as an individual. If such a powerful film cannot make a difference, what can one person do. I know one thing, I will not be visiting Marineland any time soon as places such as those are part of the problem on a larger scale.
Work has surprisingly been going quite well so far. A few mental lapses here ad there but, fairly balanced for the most part. I am still trying to break the day in to small sections which has made it simpler to have positive days. Grass cutting has started which has been going smoothly so far. The grass is quite thick right now with the combination of some moisture, fertilizer and some good sun. I love cutting grass and hopefully that is what I will be doing for the majority of the time. I was helping out with an inter lock job last Friday. I was mainly hauling dirt and clay from the back yard and loading it in to the trailer which was pretty straightforward. My back and neck have been giving me some issues of late so I have to be careful how far I push myself.
Jodi has had a sinus infection for the last week or so and seems to be near the end of it. I have managed not to get it which is good as we are pretty booked up at work right now. We went to my parents to deliver breakfast for mothers day today. I was in charge of the eggs which I must say were pretty damn good. We mulched our garden yesterday and it really stands out now. It is amazing what you can accomplish in an afternoon when you put your mind to it.
Canada lost last night to the US in the Norceca Olympic qualifying tournament which was shitty news to wake up to. I really thought this would be the year they ended their Olympic drought. They have to be proud of their accomplishments over the last few years though. They did qualify for World League which is a huge step for the program in general. It actually starts this weekend in Toronto, hopefully we can get to one of the matches.
Jays have been hanging in there of late. They just need to eliminate some late game lapses and beat up on teams they should beat up on. I take back what I said about Thames going down to Vegas, I have been impressed with his play of late. I am pumped that we picked up Vlad Guerrero, to have an another experienced bat in the line up. I am really hoping they move Edwin to first, Vlad to DH and Lind out of the line up. Lind seems like a nice guy but, he is just not producing like a first base man should.
Hope this finds you well.
Happy Mothers Day!!!
Remember that although a wall may seem to high to climb in life, if you take it down one brick at a time you will be eventually be able to walk through it with ease.
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