Joy Amidst Sorrow

The last few weeks for our family have been very trying.  The service for Amaya was on Tuesday and it was beautiful in every aspect.  The pastor had some important words for us and it helped give me a sense of  peace.  Bart spoke with great courage at the service and had a touching message.  There was a video montage that affected me deeply.  I was trying to be strong for the visitation but,  all my emotions flowed out at the service. The amount of love, strength and support that was present at the church was amazing.  I will never forget Amaya and know she will always be present in my heart.

Life works in mysterious ways at times.  As we were saying goodbye to Amaya,  a bundle of joy was brought in to this world.  I am happy to announce that Rylen Huck Amayan was born on May 21rst, 2012.  Rylen is the son of my brother Ryan and his wonderful wife, Deb.  He was born at almost nine pounds and apparently is a strong little fellow.  His hair is a mix of Ryan's natural blonde and Deb's beautiful red hair.  I cannot wait to meet him in August and hold him close.  His gift of life is something that I am eternally grateful for.  I hope I can be an Uncle that he can be proud of and I know Jodi will be a loving Aunt.

The last two weeks has been such a mixture of emotions.  Sadness, anger, fear, joy are just a few that I have felt.  I know Amaya has been looking down on me during this time as I could easily have slipped in to old patterns.  This was the first time in a long time that I had a strong urge to take a drink but,  I did not.  I knew that was not what Amaya would have wanted and I still want to be a good role model for Elias and Rylen.

The health of my mind is remarkably strong right now.  It is hard to believe where I have come from to get to this point.  I still struggle but,  never would have been able to cope like I have recently if this was three or four years a go.  I consider myself quite fortunate and am grateful for the life I have been given.

Peace be with you.

Take care,  Shawn