A Special Moment

Just wanted to share this video with you today.

http://youtu.be/pV4Gp-YcwlY

Just highlight this, right click it and then open link.

It will definitely make your day.  Wish there was more stories like this in life.

Happy Tuesday.  Take care,  Shawn.

Dog Park

I took Ollie to the dog park today with great hesitation.  It has been over a year since I last took him there as he was attacked a few times by aggressive dogs.  Ollie is a very passive dog and aggressive dogs sense that and see it as weakness.  Ollie has the size to defend himself but, he has not quite figured that out yet.  I kept him on leash there today just to get him accustomed to it again.  A few dogs came up to him and he is still skittish around them.  I was nervous too as Ollie means the world to me and did not want anything to happen to him.  I think I will see if we can start with some play dates with individual dogs before I perhaps take him to the the dog park again.  There was almost fifteen dogs there today which was not conducive to easing him back in to it.

I do not have much planned this week but,  am feeling fairly positive about things.  I started running at the gym today again which helped boost my energy a bit.  I was having trouble motivating myself over the last week to get to the gym so today was a good step.  I am playing in a co-ed volleyball tournament this Saturday which should be fun.  It costs forty bucks which is a bit more than I would like to spend on a tournament but,  I will be seeing a lot of people we know so it should be worth it.  I normally do not enjoy indoor co-ed volleyball but,  think this will be a good experience.

I start my landscape maintenance course next week which is very exciting.  It means my week is fully booked and I will learn some cool shit in the process.  It also means than I will be one week closer to spring and getting back to work.  I am so glad that I made the decision to go back this year and I hope I will see a familiar face, Smitty, when April 1rst rolls around.  I do have apprehensions but,  that is natural.  It is a difficult transition after being off but,  I am looking forward to a smoother one this time around.

Not much planned for tonight other than watching The Following on CTV.  We have watched it from the beginning and are now hooked on the show.  I believe the Leafs and Raptors play tonight too so will be checking in on them as well.  I am really hoping the Raps find a way in to the play offs.  They are such an exciting team to watch and am proud of the grit they are playing with these days.

Happy Monday.  Take care,  Shawn.

If politicians spent more time representing the people and less time spewing rhetoric,  the country would be in much better shape.

Anything is Possible

I was up till one in the morning last night.  I was watching the Canada West semi-final between Trinity Western and UBC.  I obviously have a bias towards the Spartans as my brother Ryan is the assistant coach.  They are the defending CIS champions but, have had struggles at points in the season this year.  I watched UBC play last weekend and knew the Spartans would be in for a tough test.

UBC got out to a 2-0 lead and things looked pretty dire for Trinity.  They bounced back in the third and handled UBC with ease in the set.  The fourth was where things got interesting.  The Thunderbirds came out roaring and were in complete control of the set and looked primed to be playing in the final tonight.  At one point, they were up 16-11 and I had written the boys off.  I was texting with my sister in law Deb and she never lost faith,  said she had not given up on them yet.  Well low and behold, they inched their way back in to the set and ended up winning 26-24.  Game on.

The fifth set was a back and forth battle and had me on the edge of my seat.  There was a lot of drama and some controversial calls.  I thought Trinity had won the match twice and the Thunderbirds once.  It was really hard to tell what was going on amidst all the chaos.  Trinity stayed focused and squeezed out a 17-15 triumph and booked their ticket to the Canada West finals and a spot at nationals.

Last night proved something to me,  anything is possible.  The way that fourth set was going,  there was no way Trinity should have come out on top.  I had given up but, the boys stayed together and refused to go a way without a fight.  They clawed their way back in to the match and played some inspired volleyball.  I am so proud of their determination and I learned a valuable lesson,  nothing is over till its over.  That can be applied to anything in life,  keep pushing through because you never know how things will unfold if you are determined enough.

Jodi is making some soup for dinner,  smells awesome.  Staying in again tonight to watch some hockey and then the Canada West finals.  Go Spartans!!!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend.  Take care,  Shawn.

Spring is Near

I made a decision today about my plans for the spring.  I am going back to work for the same company for a third season.  I was already leaning that way and then they offered to enroll me in a landscape maintenance course in March to learn some more skills.  I wrote back and said I was in for another season.  I am really looking forward to the course and feel I will learn a lot about some things I am not as confident with.  I am relieved that I was able to make the decision today so I can focus on mentally preparing for the eight month season.  I know all the properties, am comfortable with most jobs and feel landscaping is something I can excel at.  There will be challenges mentally for me with any job and it gives me great comfort going back to familiar territory.

I have been back to Homewood in Guelph the last few weeks.  I started seeing an amazing addictions counselor and am excited about sharing some thoughts with a professional again.  I realized recently that I have been talking the talk and not walking the walk.  I have been letting old habits creep in over the last year and it was time for me to get my shit together.  This is my third addictions counselor at Homewood and I have had success with each one I have seen.  They are really good at what they do and have all made me feel comfortable in a therapeutic setting.  As I have mentioned in an earlier blog,  addictive behaviour is often connected to bi-polar disorder.  It becomes frustrating dealing with mental struggles and addictive tendencies all at once but,  I am more confident now that I can find a good balance in my life.  Talking to a professional is important for me as it is not fair to family and friends to be responsible for all of my supports.  I have to take more initiative in being my own ambassador and putting things in place to help me succeed in daily life.

We are in for the night getting ready to watch the Trinity Western Spartans go for another Canada West Title.  Western just beat Waterloo in the OUA semi-finals and have booked their ticket to nationals.  Watching makes me wish I was still playing,  maybe I can find a tournament or two before the end of the year.

Have a great weekend.  Take care,  Shawn.

Find the simple pleasures in every day life.

Let's Talk

Tomorrow is Bell's Let's Talk day and is also my sister's 35th birthday.  Let's Talk day is an initiative to get conversations started about mental health within Canada and break the stigmas surrounding it.  Five cents from text messages, tweets and long distance calls from Bell customers will go towards programs geared towards mental health programs.  So if you are a Bell customer,  send lots of texts tomorrow and help support a long overdue program.

It is really unfortunate that this happens only once a year.  There are millions of people that suffer in silence on a daily basis and I am afraid that one day is not enough to get people the help they need.  Jodi came home with some sad news today.  A husband of one of her co-workers lost a cousin to suicide yesterday.  A grade nine student north of us also committed suicide recently.  It is a tragic end to life and affects so many families across the country.  I could easily have been a statistic and am quite honestly not sure how I made it this far.  The Bell Let's Talk Day is a good start but, we have so far to go in terms of developing sustainable programs to address mental health on a long term basis. 

I am at a bit of an impasse in my own life and am searching for a sense of identity again.  I am trying to remain hopeful that I can break previous cycles and push through obstacles I put before myself.  I am ever grateful to Jodi and to Ollie for their constant love and support.

I hope you have a chance to watch some of the programs scheduled for tomorrow on CTV about mental health.  There is a show on TSN at 8:30 tonight about a young man and his struggles.  The message will be an important one to hear so watch it if you can.

Enjoy the rest of your week.

Take care,  Shawn. 

Happy 35th Les!!!!  Love YA!!!

I Survived

Survived the air port, barely.  Was a shitty drive home.  Told Sheldon I did not want to come back for another shift last night.  Too exhausted and did not want to make that drive again.  Really needed a good night's sleep. Had basically been up for thirty hours which is not a good fit for me mentally.

Had a pretty relaxing day today.  Caught up on some NCAA hoops and went for a walk downtown with Jodi.  We found an awesome little bakery and got a chicken pot pie for dinner.  Heading to my parents to watch the Leafs game with my little bro.

Have a good night.  Shawn.

Long Night Ahead

I am getting ready to head down to the air port tonight.  We are supposed to have major snow accumulation in the next twenty four hours so I got called in.  I start at 1:00 am which is going to make for a long night.  I tried to sleep at times today to help me get ready for it but, to no avail.  I have to watch myself as this state of mind has been a slippery slope for me in the past.  When I get too tired,  my mind starts to race more frequently.  When my mind speeds up,  I tend to not always make the best decisions.  I do not think I will agree to do an overnight shift again.  It is just not worth it for my overall well being.

Will be making my way to the iconic Tim Horton's in the near future and then will take my time with the driving.  No sense in rushing so I am leaving myself lots of time.

Hope you are having a great week.  Take care,  Shawn.

Yo-Yo

I have been kind of up and down of late.  Some moments I feel like giving up,  others I feel like conquering the world around me.  Some moments I feel like a champ and others I feel like a complete loser. Sometimes my mind is at peace and others, it fucks with me.  I feel like a human yo-yo and it gets frustrating.  I did not take a shower in a few days as I did not really care too much what I looked like.  My gym membership expires today so I will not have that part of my daily routine for a while which is disappointing.  It was a good way to let out some frustrations and helped me feel more in touch with my emotions.  I am hoping to get a new one next week.

I am looking forward to spring.  Not that I know what I am doing yet but,  I am anxious to get working again.  Routine will be good for me.  I am excited about Dave's wedding but, am not sure how we are going to manage it.  I also am not sure if I can even get time off work for a week.  Really depends on what I end up doing employment wise. I am excited to cut our grass again.  I am looking forward to doing the Chapman's hedge.  Swimming at my parents seems like it is just around the corner.

We are supposed to get a big snow fall on Thursday so maybe I will end up at the air port.  I got to play around with a skid steer last time out to load salt on a few of the trucks.  Really wish I was able to plow but,  I do not mind hand shoveling and salting.  My back has been bothering me so hopefully I will be able to manage alright.

Hoping to watch some Criminal Minds tonight.  Maybe catch some of the Leafs game too.

Enjoy your week.  Take care,  Shawn.